Strange Attractors
by Nagi Kokuyo
Summary: When one of their own is mortally injured, Finn blames himself. Only Stork can convince him otherwise. Finn/Stork, Complete unless decided otherwise


**Title: **Strange Attractors

**Author: **Nagi Kokuyo

**Fandom: **Storm Hawks

**Pairings: **Finn/Stork, Aerrow/Piper

**Rating: **T (subject to change if I feel like it)

**Warnings: **Mild spoilers, homosexuality (meaning boy x boy love, people), mild language

**Disclaimer: **As much as I wish it was different, I don't own the _Storm Hawks. _If I did, I wouldn't be broke, now would I?

**Summary:** When one of their own is mortally injured, Finn blames himself. Only Stork can convince him otherwise. Finn/Stork

**A/N: **Please review! Tell me what you think, but no flames please! This is my first FxS fic, and my first Storm Hawks fic. I'm thinking of leaving this as a oneshot. Also, I wrote this awhile ago, and it hasn't really been proof-read, so please excuse any mistakes.

* * *

**_How could I be such a fool?_**

The Storm Hawks had faced a furious phoenix, the Black Gorge, Talons, Raptors, the Dark Ace repeatedly, and even Master Cyclonis herself, to name a few. They'd literally laughed in the face of death (see Dark Ace and Master Cyclonis) and had defeated enemies of far greater experience than their own. They'd almost died on numerous occasions, plunged through the skies at breakneck speeds, and been in fights that would kill anyone else. They lived in a world strewn with chaos and danger, where falling out of the sky meant entering the Wastelands and certain doom (as Stork was first to point out countless times).

And yet…

Finn had never been this scared in his life. No, he wasn't just scared; he was terrified. What he was feeling was _beyond _simply fear. His heart hurt; it was beating like a jackhammer and every time he took a breath, pain shot through his chest. Whenever he got up or moved around, he found that he couldn't stop shaking. Over and over he would run scenarios through his head, about what would happen if the other Storm Hawk didn't pull through, but no matter how many times he tried to picture it, he couldn't. He couldn't image life without him. He would lie awake at night, staring at the ceiling, until he finally gave up and returned to his friend's bedside.

**_I'm so sorry._**

The air, cold and eerily still, smelled of antiseptic and death. The walls of the room were faded, streaked where they'd been cleaned; ditto on the floor. There was plenty of room to move about, but nowhere to get comfortable. But then, comfort wasn't needed. The chair he was sitting in was stiff and hard, the same way it had been nearly two days ago when he'd first taken a seat.

**_This is my fault._**

On the side table next to him, a tray of food sat ignored; the sandwich had gone stale hours ago, about the same time the water got warm and the fruit dried. He hadn't even looked at it when Piper brought it in. The room was well lit, but it didn't make a difference to him. The others had long ago gone back to the _Condor; _the numerous repairs weren't going to get themselves done. Finn had volunteered to stay behind and watch over their fallen comrade, and he'd spent the last two nights sleeping on a cot in the hospital room. Outside, it was a pleasant day, in stark contrast to the environment inside.

**_I should have been better._**

All he could think about was what he could have done different. If he'd been faster, if he'd been stronger, then he could've saved him. He was a Storm Hawk for Atmos' sake; he should have been able to protect his teammate. No one deserved this (except maybe Talons), especially not _him. _He should have been there to help him. Instead, he'd been busy showing off and wasn't paying attention. If he'd gotten there sooner, this wouldn't have happened.

**_I could have stopped it. _**

"…I'm so sorry, buddy." His voice echoed in the quiet room.

The beeping of the heart monitor was his only response. Finn hadn't expected anything less. The doctors had told him that it could be a long time before his friend woke up, if he ever did; Healing Stones only did so much. The blond didn't want to accept the possibility that his friend would never wake up again, that he'd never see those eyes again or hear his voice. He _couldn't _accept it. The Storm Hawks had been in trouble before, and they'd always come out of it okay.

**_You have to wake up,_**

But he couldn't deny that his friend looked terrible. Almost as terrible as he felt. Finn stared at the tube running from his mouth to a machine, the IV in his left arm and another in his right, the stitches in his arm and the bandages wrapped around his too-pale skin. He watched his chest rise, fall, and rise again, and wondered if it was really him breathing or just the machines giving him life.

**_Or I'll never forgive myself._**

Now that he was so close to death, Finn couldn't remember why he had been mad at Stork in the first place. He knew they'd been arguing; insults had been traded, things had been thrown, and it had almost come to blows. It _would have _come to blows if Aerrow and Junko hadn't come in at that very moment, seen the two of them a moment from attacking each other, and separated them. He couldn't remember _why'd _they been fighting, but he would never forget what he had spat at the Merb. Those words would haunt him for the rest of his life.

**_How could I be so stupid?_**

He would never forget the look on Stork's face when he hissed those words at him. The burst of pain and dejection, and betrayal. Finn wished he could take it all back. He hadn't meant any of it; he'd just been angry and upset, over something he couldn't even recall, and he'd said something stupid. If only he could change the past so that it never happened. He wanted to see Stork cackling psychotically at the helm or creepily grinning as he describes all the possible evils that could befall them. Hell, he'd settle for eying an inanimate object with unwarranted suspicion.

**_If only I could rewrite the past. Erase what I said._**

"You have to wake up, Stork. Please."

_Beep…beep…beep…beep…beep…_

**_Maybe things would be different._**

"It can't end like this."

**_Maybe you'd still be okay._**

Stork was never supposed to get hurt. He was the pilot, the helmsman; he didn't actively fly with the rest of the squadron, nor did he wish to, for that matter. He didn't get involved in the actual fight unless he didn't have a choice and then he stayed in the _Condor _and just blasted the enemies out of the sky. Even when he had no other choice, the Merb took the safest (and most paranoid) option, the "Stork-Mobile."

**_We'd be hanging out on bridge, or you'd be freaking out because the _****Condor ****_broke down again._**

He wasn't supposed to get hurt. Not this badly. Finn dropped his head into his hands, feeling ill with guilt. It was his fault that Stork was hurt, and he couldn't do anything other than think about what he could have done differently to change it.

**_It doesn't matter._**

**_What matters is that you get better._**

Images flashed through his mind:

_Dark Ace leading a troop of Talons on Skimmer, weapons raised_

_Aerrow leaping onto Dark Ace's Skimmer, blades blazing cerulean_

_Junko punching a hole through a Talon's ride_

_Dark Ace flying off into the clouds, the Talons falling to the ground below_

_Returning to the _Condor _just in time to see a Talon sneak up behind the helmsman, blade in hand_

_A spray of blood, shattering glass, and a burst of light, and the next moment…_

_Stork crumpled on the deck below, blood already pooling on the ground around him_

"You shouldn't have gotten hurt."

**_I'm so sorry, Stork. Please forgive me._**

"…And it's my fault. I should have seen him. I should have protected you."

The diagnosis wasn't good: massive blood loss, a gash in his arm several inches deep, nerve damage, and a hole the size of a fist in his right lung, not to mention countless scratches and bruises. The Talon had done serious injury to the Merb; even with the aid of a Healing Stone, Stork's life was still in jeopardy. A few times, the constant beeping had faltered, and each time, Finn had frozen on the spot, waiting for the crucial indication that Stork's heart was still beating to even out. Each time he was certain that it would cease, that Stork's body would give out and the Storm Hawk would be lost forever.

"Please forgive me…"

**_Please…_**

Finn felt so helpless right then. He was one of Atmos' greatest sharpshooters, and he couldn't do a damn thing to save his friend. All he could do was sit around and wait. And pray. He'd done a lot of praying. He didn't know what deity he believed in, and he didn't really care as long as Stork pulled through. Over two days since the oldest Storm Hawk had been admitted and not a sign of recovery. Not a twitch, not a murmur, not a single comment about being doomed. Nothing. Just the sounds from the machines and Finn's own muttering.

The sound of rustling cloth drew him out of his musings, and his head shot up. Dark eyes looked at him blearily. Bleary and unfocused, but open.

**_Oh thank Atmos!_**

"Stork!"

Relief flooded through him, followed quickly by apprehension. The Merb might be awake, but that didn't necessarily mean that he was out of danger, and it certainly didn't resolve things between them. Still groggy, Stork bit down on the obtrusive tube in his mouth. Finn put a hand on his bony shoulder and shook his head quickly. "Don't! You're breathing through that tube, dude. I wouldn't bite it if I were you."

Stork started to nod, and then winced in pain. Finn squeezed his shoulder gently; somewhere in the back of his mind, he noticed that the Merb hadn't tensed or recoiled at the contact. Maybe there was still hope. Or, and this was more likely, Stork was so doped up on drugs that he hadn't noticed which of his teammates was with him.

"Take it easy. You were hurt pretty bad. You'll still need to rest."

The sharpshooter stood and turned towards the door, ready to leave.

"I'll go find the others and tell 'em you're awake. You probably don't want to be around me anyway."

**_Why would you? It's my fault you're in here._**

A four-fingered hand grabbed his wrist in a surprisingly strong grip for someone in Stork's position. Finn looked back at the pilot. With his other hand, Stork made the motion of writing. It took a few tries, but Finn finally got the message—Stork wanted a pad of paper and something to write with.

"Oh! Gotcha. Hold on a sec."

**_ Anything to get you to forgive me._**

It took him a few minutes to find the paper and a pencil, but he found them. Stork wouldn't be able to speak, due to the healing lung and tube, but his hands were still functional. Finn handed them to the helmsman, who immediately started scribbling. A moment later, he flipped it back around, showing a message scrawled in messy writing:

_WHAT HAPPENED, WHY AM I IN A HOSPITAL, AND IS IT A FATAL DISEASE?_

Finn rubbed the back of his neck. This would be interesting.

"Um, well…for starters, no, it's not a fatal disease. It…" He paused, trying to find the words. How did one tell a friend that they were inches from death? "It was a Talon…One of them got on board the _Condor… _He—he snuck up behind you, Storky. I came into the helm just in time to watch him stab you and send you crashing through the glass."

He clenched his fists, furious with himself for even letting it happen.

"Stork, I…I'm sorry. I should have stopped him."

**_I wasn't good enough to help you in time._**

_HOW WERE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO THAT? YOU SAID HE WAS ALREADY THERE._

**_That doesn't matter._**

"…He was. But I should have been able to do something. I should have been able to save you."

_I'M STILL ALIVE, AREN'T I?_

**_Yes, Stork, you are, and thank Atmos for that._**

Finn would have sworn that Stork was smirking. His heart beat faster as the Merb's dark eyes bore into his; he could feel it pounding in his chest.

"You have no idea how close it was to going the other way, Stork. No idea," he said quietly.

Stork scribbled something else, this time taking longer than before.

_HOW'S THE CONDOR? IS SHE ALL RIGHT? WHERE'S EVERYONE ELSE? I'D EXPECT AERROW TO BE WATCHING ME LIKE A HAWK. PUN FULLY INTENDED._

Finn laughed shakily, well aware and thankful that Stork was changing the subject for his sake, and said, "The _Condor_'s fine, Storky. A few scratches and some broken glass, but nothing that Junko and you can't fix. Actually, Junko's probably already done. Everyone else went back to the ship; Aerrow said that they were going to fix her up for you, so that she'll be good as…well, not good as new, but she won't break down on you first thing."

More writing, and then:

_WHY DIDN'T YOU GO WITH THEM?_

Stork's eyes were locked with his, black boring into blue, and he couldn't turn away or avoid answering the question.

The truth was that he'd stayed behind because he was worried about Stork, more worried than his macho pride would ever let him admit. But like hell he was going to tell _Stork _that. He would tell the Merb that he'd stayed behind in case the Cyclonians came back to finish the job, or he'd stayed to get out of chores, or—

_THE TRUTH, FINN._

_AND I'LL KNOW IF YOU'RE LYING._

Well, there went _that _plan. But how could he possibly tell Stork the truth, after what he'd done? Even if Stork forgave him, there was no way he'd accept it.

Finn couldn't deny that when he was close to Stork, his heart skipped and raced, and he couldn't concentrate on anything else. He couldn't get the helmsman out of his head, even when he was exploring a terra with the others and Stork was on the _Condor. _He found himself staying up at night thinking about him, trying to sort out what he was feeling. He would get up early each morning, before anyone else, just so he could have some alone time with Stork up at the bridge, because it was guaranteed that the Merb would already be up and at the controls. Eventually, he'd had to admit it to himself:

**_I'm falling for you._**

Finn could come up with a million (okay, maybe not that many, but a lot) reasons why crushing on Stork was a _baaaad _idea. For one, they were two different species: Finn was human and Stork was a Merb. He was _humanoid, _but he wasn't human. For another, if it didn't work out and they wound up hating each other, it could destroy their friendship—damage the team, even, maybe beyond repair. On top of all that, their personalities were so different that there was _no way _they'd ever be able to make it work; Finn was laid-back, egotistical, and hyperactive, while Stork was uptight, paranoid, and mistrustful of everything that moved (and some things that didn't). Total opposites.

**_Ever hear the phrase 'strange attractors'? Otherwise known as 'opposites attract.' Two people that are so different that they shouldn't get along the way they do, and yet…they can't help but be pulled together._**

In one of his infamous split-second decisions, Finn leaned down, brushed his lips against Stork's cheek, and pulled back. Face burning, he turned on his heel and made a beeline for the door. With his hand on the doorknob, he said quietly, "I'll go get Aerrow and the others." And then he was gone, jogging down the hall towards the lobby and leaving the door to swing closed.

And in room E24, Stork let his head drop back and his eyes close.

**_Maybe we're strange attractors._**


End file.
